A birthday party...

My son's girlfriend and her twin brother have a BIG birthday coming up. They will be 18 in December, and we were considering treating her to a spa day and dinner out to the restaurant of her choosing, something along those lines.. It's a big day after all --- 18 years old! woohoo!!

So anyway..... this morning we wake up to a text from Krystal's dad... Jubilantly telling us he's planning a birthday party. I thought -- Oh... This should be good... And boy oh boy -- was I right! He's planning a "night on the town" and taking them to the "313 Club" in Manchester NH... Imagine that -- He's planning an 18th birthday party for his kids - at a gay club.

He didn't include either of them in the plans, didn't ask what they wanted to do for their birthday... Told her he was planning a party at a "multi-cultural club", put a 'sign up' on facebook stating a charge of $10 per person and started planning it.. I SERIOUSLY doubt that a group of straight 18 year old kids are going to have much fun at a gay club. Maybe if they were turning 21, I could see doing the club thing. But still, I don't see the logic in it at all....

It's typical of him though -- 2 months ago, when she moved in with us, she tried to talk to him prior to moving in, his response was "whatever Krystal! I don't have time for this right now!" He was running for a seat on the town council. He lost that election, so now he wants to be superdad.. UGH!! It disgusts me to no end!

I texted him tonight after work, and asked him what EVER gave him the idea, that to take a group of kids to a bar -- was a GOOD idea?? I was promptly told to leave the parenting to him and their mother -- and that until I was her parent, I could butt out or he'd make her move back to his house. I called her mother, and she said Krystal could "move" to her house, but stay here 99.999% of the time.. LOL

For the record -- I've tried playing devil's advocate.. I tried putting myself on all sides of the issue:

• I can't imagine going to a gay club as an 18 year old for friend's birthday party.

• I can't imagine being at a gay club with my partner and/or friends and having a straight 18 year old birthday party going on at the next table...

• I can't imagine saying to Kyle -- Ok -- We've planned your next milestone birthday party. We're taking you and your straight girlfriend to a gay club.

I can't see any of those scenarios = fun for the KIDS! It's their birthday! Their 18th birthday! And he wants to use it to go clubbing? And have the kids all pitch in and pay for it?!?!? ACK!!!!!!!!!!!

The bottom line here -- is Krystal is the one who will be hurt by it all. If she defies her dad and doesn't go, she will be turning her back on her family. Not many of her friends will be able to attend, either because parents would frown on the situation or because they won't be 18 yet, and unable to get into the club. All he is doing is hurting her and alienating her more, and in the end it will be everyone else's fault but his...

The whole thing just makes me sick to my stomach..

The Kindness of Strangers.....

About a week ago, we were at the gas station, and Tae had gone in to pay for our gas. She came out to the car and was telling me how an elderly lady had come in to the store to ask if they would PLEASE take a check to pay for some gas to put in her car... She had picked up her ailing husband from the nursing home, had no money, and was trying to make it home, and she was afraid she was going to run out of gas on the side of the road. They absolutely refused. So I handed Tae $10, and told her to go give it to the woman. The woman grabbed her in a big hug, and paid for her gas. When she came out, I went over and pumped her gas. She couldn't believe the kindness of strangers, and wanted our names to send us a check.. I patted her on the arm, and told her to take her husband home, and have a good day...

Later that same week, we were at the grocery store, and as we came out of the store, I noticed a different elderly lady was trying to transfer her bags from her cart, to her back seat. I could see that she was struggling and offered to help.. I guess the bag boy didn't notice she was 80 something, and about 4'11" -- How was she going to lift the bag that weighed probably 15lbs out of her cart?? She was appreciative beyond words.. I told her not to try and lift that bag out of her car when she got home! To think about transferring some of the items to a couple of bags so she would be able to safely carry her purchases into her house.

Karma... are you paying attention here??? LOL Seriously though -- I wonder how much longer that woman would have had to beg that guy at the store to work something out with her so she could get her husband home safely.... or how many people - caught up in their own agenda of the day -- would have walked by the other woman struggling with her bags without offering to help??

Just sayin................

Kimber rocks!

As someone who was born and raised on the outskirts of Cincinnati --- I think this is JUUUSSST about the ONLY thing I miss about Ohio! Luckily for me, I have the bestest BFF in the whole wide world -- and she'll go to the store and buy these packets to send us! It's not quite the same as you can get at the restaurant (Skyline or Gold Star) but it's pretty close!! Now if we could just find a Steak 'n Shake nearby!

So I get a package in the mail from her ---- knowing there are some chili packets for us.. and The L Word Season 5 DVD Set.... And I'm like -- YAY!!! Then.... I find 2 of these little jars (see pic below).. That right there folks, is absolutely the BEST blackberry preserves you will ever have in your life... The first time I ever went to her house, she made homemade blackberry pie for us.. *drool*

Did you guys know that Kimber rocks?? AND she has a birthday this Wednesday the 26th?? So this is my official 'birthday card' to her... And it's better than calling her and singing to her -- I think I would prefer to spare her the agony!! So anyway... Happy Birthday Kimmie!! :D

Children's Theater

My son (Kyle) and his girlfriend (Krystal), are very involved in the local theater. They first became involved with doing a production of Grease with the High School Drama club, 2 1/2 years ago. She played the part of Rizzo, and he was an extra T-Bird. How could they pass it up?? They began dating after that, and are very much a couple in every sense of the word. I'm sure ONE of the many reasons they were drawn to each other, is that her Dad is gay, and has been with his partner for about 7 years. But I'll save that for another blog! Back on topic:

Their drama club has been to state competitions, and won! And they've had many other awesome opportunities since becoming involved. For the past 3 summers, they've been involved with F.A.C.T. (Franklin Area Children's Theater) where they get to take a group of kids -- and involve them in a stage production. The teenagers always design, build, paint the set. Run all the lights and sound equipment. They take on the rolls of director, producer, stage managers, babysitter, etc. They teach kids their lines, songs, make costumes with the kids. 100% of the production is the teenagers, with the drama advisor there to help out when needed. She was out of town for a week last summer, and they went on without her. As they say -- The show must go on!

The first year, they did 101 Dalmations - Kyle & Krystal played the couple that had the dalmations (Roger and Anita) It was VERY cute -- and they had about 75 kids ranging in age from about 6 to about 11 or so.
The 2nd year, they did The Jungle Book and the number of kids grew from 75 to about 125:
This is Krystal with her little sister after the play.
This year -- They had over 150 kids and decided to do Aladdin. It was very cute as usual, and very well put together!

Krystal is in the first picture here - She's the one wearing the red outfit.

And here is Kyle as Jafar -- the evil villain!

They really have a lot of fun on stage --- I know Kyle is going to miss it this fall when he goes on to college -- but he'll still be able to be somewhat involved through Krystal as she is going into her Senior year this fall!

It's a bird! A plane! A hover craft????

So, I think most of us will agree, that The HRC is an awesome organization. Their mission statement for anyone who is not aware, is fairly long winded so I won't paste the entire thing. But you can go here to read it if you're so inclined. I had not ACTUALLY read the entire thing until the other day...

I was watching something I had DVR'd, and was fast forwarding through the commercials. When I noticed these pictures flashing by. At first I was like.. Wait.. is THAT what I think it is?? Right there.. on that guy's shirt?!?! And, of course noone was here watching with me to actually confirm it for me.. The empty chair didn't respond... So I hit rewind, and sure enough it's the 'equal rights' logo from The HRC. I figured, well hey, at least they didn't keep the refund from the guy with the logo on his shirt. It's just subtle enough. I'm all for it, if it will raise more awareness. I mean, it made me go to their website --- even if it was to steal the image for this post!

It also made me look around at the site. They have a state by state list of 'hrc news' and out of curiosity, I decided to look at our state. I already knew that New Hampshire now will recognize same sex marriage. But what I didn't know, is they will now issue new birth certificates to transsexuals who have undergone sex-reassignment surgery. I was taken quite by surprise! I had no idea this was even up for debate. I thought -- Hey! We're movin' on up here huh?

Then ----- I found that under New Hampshire hate crimes law, protection is offered for sexual orientation, but NOT for a crime commited against someone based on gender identity. WTF is up with that? We'll give a new birth certificate while patting ourselves on the back for someone who has had the reassignment surgery, but if you get your ass kicked, or worse, because someone thinks your gender is in question..... Welllllllllllllll.... Hey....What more did you want???

I suppose we all get caught up in our own day to day stuff, and forget to pay attention to the goings on around us. I have put The HRC's website on my toolbar, and intend to pay closer attention to things in our community. If you already pay attention, then kudos to you! I hope everyone else will jump on board.

Kelly Clarkson

This picture is being posted especially for someone I know..... She has always been a *ahem* fan of Miss Kelly Clarkson... heh

:D Come out come out wherever you are Kimber!!!

LFOA - Lesbian Feline Ownership Alliance

Some of us realized later in life that to be completely true to ourselves is a GOOD thing. For some of us, it took awhile to figure out what that means. I grew up living in the middle of the bible belt, in a super small town.... As expected of me, I married, had my son. Then I divorced, and married again... before I realized the 'error of my ways' - Or maybe more like -- why I was so unhappy living that 'other life'

My younger sister somehow figured it out long before I did. She was a little baby dyke -- looking back on it now, I'm not sure how I didn't see it for myself.. I mean, I was a really good girl scout... I guess I didn't know at the time that I was scouting for girls.. LOL

Anywho........ I was talking to my sister on facebook chat last night, and thought I could share a bit of the conversation here with you all... She's just as big of a smart ass as I am... and it shows here...

7:30pm Me: :)

7:36pm Sis: hello. i was just cleaning the bathroom. that is what i get for slacking yesterday...

7:39pm Me: that'll teach you.. I'm cleaning out litter boxes and not cuz I slacked yesterday... cuz tomorrow is trash day

7:41pm Sis: reason # 1 that i don't have cats...

7:41pm Me: you have to get at least one cat eventually.. or you may lose your lesbian membership card

7:44pm Sis: a willing sacrifice...

7:45pm Me: I'll have to report you to the main office you are in violation of lesbian-feline-ownership-alliance rule #249.560.45 as follows:

"you are required by the by-laws to take in at least ONE cat/kitten"

7:49pm Sis: i need a copy of that handbook...

7:49pm Me: YOU didn't get your COPY??

7:51pm Sis: no. can you arrange that for me?

7:52pm Me: I'll see what I can do... sheeesh... You got in before me, and I'm the one keeping you in touch with all the current rules and regulations!

7:53pm Sis: if the rules include that kind of pussy... count me out.

7:54pm Me: you'll have to give back the toaster oven you got when you joined if you count yourself out

or wait a minute.. you'd be counting yourself back IN wouldn't you?? alright.. I'll see what I can do about the handbook.. maybe there's an alternative to taking in a cat.. but we'll see

and I'd better get back to cleaning out these boxes.. they aren't going to clean themselves!!!

7:55pm Sis: well if they did, that might change my attitude about having getting a cat.

7:55pm Me: well they actually DO make them you know?!?!?

7:56pm Sis: They DO??? Oh........ Well, I don't know if cats are my thing..

7:56pm Me: But of COURSE they are.. You are a lesbian after all

Oh my mother would just absolutely croak if she knew either of us ever used the word 'pussy' and we were not talking about a feline!!

What not to wear... EVER!

Oh today was one of those days where you just WISH you had a camera! And by the time you realize that your phone takes decent pictures, the opportunity has passed you by! The pics I found online might give you an idea, so I apologize - but you'll have to use your imagination.

As I stated earlier in another post on the same subject, I do NOT profess to be an official member of the fashion police.... But today I was pulling into my favorite shopping establishment (see previous post here). I'm parked near the garden center and as I'm getting out of my vehicle, that's when I spotted her.

This woman was a bit older, I'd have to say she was probably in her 60's. She was wearing this outfit. Remember disco?? Spandex pants? Well.... She had a pair on. They were an awful blue and...... Shimmery!!!!! It's nice and sunny today for the first weekend in probably a month.. She was shimmery alright.. and to top it all off, she had white slouch socks over the pants, with white sneakers, a white t-shirt and a fanny pack. The t-shirt was being worn at an angle so she had access to her fanny pack.

The kicker that had me doubling over with laughter... She had a hair bow in her hair that matched the pants..... Well, almost... It wasn't very shimmery though... I hope the description does it justice.. I just wish I had been a little quicker on the ball.. I walked through the store looking for her to snap a picture, but maybe she knows better than I do, where they stock her pants so I didn't see her again...

Oh well... In any case - that full length mirror law keeps looking like more and more of a good idea to me!!

A Chance Meeting......

I have been trying to think of a blog idea for a couple of days -- all weekend to be exact. I mean, I've had 3 days now of a weekend -- anddddd bupkus.... I've read other's blogs looking for ideas, without much success.

So I figured I could share our story. So where do I start?

Hmmm... let's see..... I was nearing the end of my 2nd marriage - yes - to a man.. He and I had only been married a little less than 2 years at this point. We had been running our own janitorial service for 5 years which had gone belly up and he wasn't ready to completely let go of the idea of being self employed. So he sat at home, on the computer, smoked about 3 packs a day and felt sorry for himself, while I went to work - luckily at that point, I had been able to get my old job back. He did finally take a paper route at night to help out -- but that isn't the highest paying side job in the world!! I would usually take a little time while he was gone, to get on the computer and check my email, and then I'd play a few games online... It was like my down time. Plus it was the only time the computer was available without a huge argument, or him looking over my shoulder waiting to get back on it!!

So, I had a favorite game at flipside.com called Doublecross. It's like scrabble with a twist. You could enter a room, and choose a table to sit at. If someone had started a game you could go in and watch, or ask them if they wanted to join you -- or just chat...

It was around 11:00 pm, on December 5, 2000 when he left to go on his paper route. I figured I could get online for a little bit. Wow.. Even as I type this, I'm kind of laughing a little to myself. This was dial up!! Remember when aol was the most popular web service, and you had to listen for what we always called the 'fax tones'?? So anyway... I get online, and check my email and decide to go play a few games. So I go to flipside and pick a room out of a possible 5 rooms. There are 50 tables in the room, and I start scrolling down through the tables looking for available seats. Now I normally avoided the tables with players using male avatars, since I wanted to avoid the stupid pick up lines and such! I mean, I was only there to play a stupid word game!!

So there were many tables with openings -- and I have no idea what made me click on this table. The screenname of the person sitting there was DreamerTae00. Seemed pretty safe. And I was fairly certain it wouldn't be a guy using a name like that, I clicked on it. And that's how she and I met.

• No big secret match.com link up
  

• No chat rooms where everbody there is "lookin' for luv"
  

• No offers for a 'hook up' from a friend
  

At the time, neither of us were happy in our relationships. She was in Idaho, I was in Ohio. I don't think either of us realized where that chance meeting would take us! And here we are 8.5 years later in New Hampshire, and I certainly canNOT imagine my life being any different!

Her mom had passed away in February of 99, and that anniversary was coming up soon. She had been unable to attend the funeral. She says that about a week and a half before the night we met, she asked her mom to help her figure out what to do next. How to get out of Idaho. How to get to the next phase in her life. We are completely convinced her mom told me where to click. Which room.... Which table... And whether you believe in that sort of thing or not??? I can't tell you what made me click that table, and not the one above or below it...

Meet Two Of Our 4-Legged Kids

Back in August of 2001... On a very HOT and MUGGY day in Southern O-hi-uh... Tuffy found us.


As the afternoon wore on, thunderstorms were approaching. It was certain to be heavy downpours, lightning/thunder... And would probably only serve to make it even more oppressive the next day!!! I arrived home from work, we had dinner, and I decided to go shower to try and cool down... So while I'm in the shower, I hear some excited mumblings out in the hallway. I finish up in the bathroom, only to come out and see this black dog looking at me! She was underweight, her fur was all matted around her hind quarters, and she was shaking like a leaf! She was absolutely terrified of the thunder outside... Every time the thunder boomed, she cowered!

At this point, we were living in an apartment where there were no dogs allowed... And we all knew we couldn't keep her... But none of us could bear the thought of sending her back to wherever she came from! She was starving, and in need of some definite TLC!

To this very day, she hides under my desk when there's a thunderstorm, or firecrackers going off in the neighborhood. She also does NOT like men. And no -- we haven't instilled that in her!! We really believe that she was mistreated by someone at her previous home. She knew what she was doing when she left there, and which window to walk up to.

This is her today...

I guess this picture brings me introduce you to one of our other kids -- Her name is Shaggy... Tuffy was there watching when she was born. She earned this name because she seemed to really take to Tuffy even as a very tiny kitten. She is fearless, and they are the best of friends. The only difference here, is the dog's name is not Scooby!

In this picture, I think I caught her at a bad moment. She's starting to feel her age. As we all know, it's not as easy to stay in shape as you grow older. She watches her weight carefully!!


So that is my first installment.... More to come soon!!